Take my hand

I want

"I want to win the lotto. Today! Then I can tell them to shove their job."

To want implies that I lack something. A lack of anything is always negative.

So when I keep saying I want to win the lotto, or I want a new job I am surrounding myself with negative energy. But what is the alternative? If you hate your job so much that you can't bear to get up in the morning and face it, how do you turn that into a positive?

I've read books telling me that I need to tell myself that I already have enough money and a great job and it will be so. Also not to focus on what I don't want, like this current job. Don't is negative and if you focus on it, you'll bring it into being.

I've tried the positive affirmations, but I found it hard sticking with them. A good place to start though is to have goals and visualize them happening. Focus on that being the reality, which is much like the affirmations, but you're seeing it in your minds eye instead of ranting on and on to yourself and starting to feel insane.

I'm not saying you shouldn't try the affirmations. I just didn't get it right. I work in pictures. So seeing it is easier than saying it for me.

Not that I seem any less insane as a smile crosses my face for no apparent reason. No reason that is, that others can see. But I can see my vision getting closer and closer. So close I can almost touch it. I know that it's going to happen.

Now I need to condition myself into thinking that I already have and don't want anything. It's going to take a lot of reminding before it becomes a habit. It is the re-education of my brain, from years of wanting to a future of having.

Can you have and not want to make it reality?